So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
