Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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