is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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