Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
