Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
