dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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