can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
