i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
