Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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