I must be too annoying 4 u.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
