4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
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