you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
