I would go down on you faster than GM stock
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
