I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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