I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I want her autograph on my taint
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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