I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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