Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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