You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Bring me that man meat
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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