Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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