don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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