About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
