I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Are we still banned from the library?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
