Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Randomize
