stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
