Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I want to make a zoo with you.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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