haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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