and you said cock pushups were impossible
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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