I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
