i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
