Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
She needs sedatives and a leash
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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