bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
