Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
