I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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