"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
