You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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