physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
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