it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Randomize
