Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I love how my cats smell like pot.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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