question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize