hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
