I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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