After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize