We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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