is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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