fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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