Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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