Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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