Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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