Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
