I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize